Becoming Ourselves - The Podcast

From Author to Authority Series - First Draft Fun

April 13, 2022 Season 4 Episode 4
Becoming Ourselves - The Podcast
From Author to Authority Series - First Draft Fun
Show Notes Transcript

You've got the right space, you've got the support, you cranked out those ideas and the outline, now it's time to get busy putting it all together.

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Juli Wenger:

We're on this earth for a purpose. You want to live a life that matters. So let's get through the fear and the overwhelm and all the crap that gets in the way of you living the life of fear for this is the becoming ourselves podcast where we are fired up about you getting clear on who you are, what you're called to, and how to get there. Because the world is waiting for you to show up and own your power. I'm your host, Juli Wenger, a coach, a speaker, a Jesus lover in Enneagram, two, and a tree shaker, let's dive into what's keeping you stuck. Because on the other side, is a life that's fired up the film. It's week four, from author to authority, this series leading up to the launch of fired up fulfilled and Free PS get on the presale list. I'm really excited about it. Because we've had the opportunity to talk about everything from deciding that you're actually going to write a book, which is where most people get hung up to building the foundations that you need to actually be set up for success in writing the book to environments and accountability. Where do you need to put yourself in? Who do you need to surround yourself with to actually get it done? So today, we're going to jump back into the process at the point of you've got to get the content out of you. The first draft this week, again, we're going to dive into what's the process? What's the personal growth? And what's the provision? And how does God show up. And we're actually going to start with talking a bit more about the spiritual component that was really fundamental for me, because getting the content out actually requires being in the right mind space, and Hertz space to be able to do that. So in sitting down to actually write the content, one of the first things that I would do consistently, is I would check in with God, I'd turn on a song, like we talked about in the environment episode, and likely have that repeat the whole time. And sometimes that was songs that reminded me of where he was leading us to collectively as we go on this journey, and what I was writing about, and sometimes it would be something that's more instrumental that just would get me into the right kind of mood. And then I'd pray and say, Hey, like, this is, this is your book. This is your book. So tell me how you want me to show up, show me how you want me to show up flow through as I sit down to do this thing, empower me, give me the focus, give me the energy, give me the ability to execute on this thing. Because here's the reality. actually writing it is a whole nother ballgame. We get ourselves through these continual hurdles, we get ourselves through the I'm deciding hurdle, no takes you back sees hold your nose and jump, okay. And then we get ourselves through, we actually have some context of what, generally speaking, this content might look like, what are the bigger buckets? What are the smaller areas that fit underneath those? What might the chapter structure look like? How many spaces are there to fill, and we put ourselves in an environment to succeed. But then we have to actually sit and write it out. And sometimes that's exciting. And sometimes it's really mundane, and it feels like it's just not flowing. And so being able to say, Okay, God, I need you. I need you to guide me in this, I need you to drop the context or the information or, you know, help me find some flow. That was actually one of the most important pieces. Because otherwise we can get pulled into our own ego stories, we can get pulled into pride and coming off as a No at all, we can end up in a space that isn't actually what's going to move people. And if we're approaching book writing from a perspective of faith, and from being called to do it, that that is one of our assignments to execute on in our life. And in this season. It's got to be spirit led. So that was the first piece and then we'd get into more of the process. So the process would look like we'd open up Scrivener. So when we talked about systems this is the system that I defaulted to that worked the best for my brain, and I would look for Where, where's the beginning? Where's the starting point. And initially, I thought the starting point was going to be a conversation about not enoughness. And so I sat down and I looked at, What content do I already have is there some stuff that I can copy and paste or that I can look at for inspiration because we've put together a lot of talks. And we've put together a lot of workshops and a lot of podcasts and a lot of social media content over the years, where, in theory, a lot of the book was already written. Or at least I thought that that was the case, I didn't end up reusing a lot of it directly, but it at least gave me some inspiration, and some pointers, in terms of here's the key things that you might want to cover. And then let's see what else comes. Now. That's how my brain works. Okay, it pulls from all over the place. And so if you give me too much structure within the actual chapter, other than we need to talk about these key areas, I'll get hung up in it, I'll get stuck in it. So there's a bit of a starting from scratch, but having inspiration points to look at that really works for my brain and how my brain is wired. And so I'd sit down and write about not enoughness and and get a whole bunch of stuff out. And I'd know that my next space I was gonna lean into was too muchness, reclaiming too much. And as I got through, not enough, and I got through too much, it occurred to me, we really need to talk about fear, we really need to give people a context, because ego is not going to show up until later. And ego is where we circle back on the conversation about fear, but we actually need to understand fear a little bit, understand not enoughness, and to muchness. Okay, I need to add a piece. So there was some of that that was going on. So I'd add buckets and and say, Okay, I need to add this piece. Do I feel like I have the capacity to write that right now? Or do I want to keep going into the next thing. And it was really important, this was key. And this was something that our writing coaches in my bootcamp told us Do not edit while you go. Now, that's hard for me because I am a recovering perfectionist. And when I do something and want it to be done, right, but it was, nope, let's not be in that headspace. Let's be in a space of we're just getting it out. If there's spelling errors, fine, you can go fix them later. If there's references that you need, just put like reference in all caps and come back to it later. If there's research that you need to do on a section, just mark that, and then go back and expand on it after when I got to the section on ego. I realized something I had really solid general context for how the ego works. But was it thorough enough that I could stand on it without referencing and giving credit to outside sources to back it up? And so that was one of those sections where I got my general content out, and then I went hold up, because God put a pause in me. And when he does that, you have to listen. When he does that, it's that flagged this, and then go dive into it. So I got all of my main content out. And then I spent a day just researching and looking for, okay, this is how I think this works. But what resources, what legitimate articles, what legitimate references and resources can I pull from that will help reinforce or that will actually adjust and tweak how I frame this, how I present this? And that was something that grew me. Honestly, that was something where it wasn't, you're wrong, but it was, there's another level. And there's more context that you can give this in the leveraging of research and other people's work that will really help people to trust the content, and will have you know, that you are in integrity and how you're presenting it. Because remember, this is all about people's transformation. Writing a book, the purpose that underpins it is about what impact can we create for people, your purpose is for you, but it's not about you. So how do we make sure that we are serving people to the best of our capability, and our capacity, given where we're at and our own personal journey, and our own life experiences? Well, we can do a little bit of research. Google is awesome. Checking for definitions of words to make sure that you're using the right context is easy. Going to find some scientific and psychological context on how our ego works. and how our subconscious works in which parts of the brain do which things. That's easy. And then we're honoring our readers. So that kind of thing would happen. I mean, here's what else shows up. Okay. And this is the part that we get into personal growth on is that as we're working our way through the process, and as we get into talking about things, like, for example, comparison, because that was a key thing. In my book, we talked about the comparison trap, and then the capability gap. When I got to comparison, I realized that I was still in a space where I was comparing to the people around me. Did I know all about it? Do I understand it? How it works? Yes, had I rooted that out deeply enough? Was it bringing up something for me and reading my own words, and hearing my inner critic pop up and seeing the imposter syndrome pop up that it highlighted for me, okay, hold up, you have some processing to do. Because you're looking at these other authors in your group. And some of them are saying their books done already. And you feel like, you're not as worthy as they are, because you're not done yet. Or where you're trying to evaluate your value against what someone else is perceived. accomplishments are in your own eyes. There was some emotional baggage that would get triggered, as I'd work through different contexts, different topics. And because there was pieces of pulling in my own story, I had to think about where did, let's say in the context of my own, not enough news stories? Because that's been a big one for me my whole life? Where did that come from? I had to look at where do I see that? In my own childhood? What are the relevant stories there that I need to share? Are there stories there that I don't want to share? What's up with that? Is it not honoring me or my audience to share stories? Or is it just fear? Is it fear of rejection? Is it fear of actually getting confirmation in my own, not enoughness that I am working on actively reclaiming. And standing in God says I'm enough, he sees me as worthy and holds my enoughness as settled and alive. So my enoughness is settled, he's put me here on purpose. So my enoughness is settled. That stuff just comes up and it comes up and it comes up. And part of it is I zoom out, and I look at it from an observer context is because writing the book is exhausting. I'd work full days, I'd hang out with my kids for a bit, I'd hop into this thing I'd write for two hours, I would stretch my edges, I would try to just like, let's get through it. And then I'd hop out and I finished getting my kids to bed because they don't settle well, when they're out of their own schedule. And they're not getting their mom time. And it was a lot. When we start to get trained, and we start to get tired, we default into our old patterns, because they're easier because they're well worn neural pathways. They're like concrete tunnels are easy to drive down or to move down without resistance, and the new patterns, the things that I've been learning and teaching and working through and journeying through the last couple years, they're not as well worn yet. So my subconscious and my ego wants to default into the old patterns. It wants to default into the people pleasing. It wants to default into the worrying about what people think it wants to default into, am I actually enough? Am I actually worthy of writing about this stuff, because I'm still facing it, because it's still up in my face right now. And so there was a lot of getting curious about that. And making space despite how full those days were to do self care and soul care about making time for me about making time to connect to my relationship and about just realizing that this is a short term pain. This is a season of push. And I don't like push, I like pull. I don't want to operate from a place of push because I did that for so many years. And I know what the consequences look like. And yet there was this very intentionally chosen season that I was in of you just have to you have to get this out. You have to make the best of this time you have to be obedient to what you were told to do. Because there is a cost if you're not and the cost is not just He who it's to the people whose lives are supposed to him packed, there was this push. And there was this internal struggle. And there was this exhaustion. And honestly, when the book actually got finished, when it all got out, it took me a month to recover. It took me a month of just feeling tired and kind of burnt out and empty. And I had to get through first round editing and reading through it. And I was just like, Whoo, I'm done. And that's part of the struggle with getting it out. And I think that's part of what takes so long for people, when you think about that it's gonna take me or two years or three years to write a book, it's that a lot of people won't push through that part of the process. The whole process doesn't have to be like that. But there are seasons in getting your book out in writing it in building it and creating it in birthing it, that it's just like, it's a lot. It's a lot. And I so had to lean into, Okay, God, I need that energy that's willing at and working in me to do what will give you pleasure, which is what's going to give me pleasure, which is going to be what's good for me, which is, I need you to fill me up, I need you to help me keep going, I need you to help me to show up for my clients who I'm still serving in this process. I need you to help me keep the wheels on the business. While we're going and you know why it was so cool, is you want to talk about provision in this phase. I needed a new assistant. And I put out a job ad right before this whole boot camp October thing happened. And he sent me get this an editor. He sent me an assistant that was an editor she was the only interview I had, I had so much peace about her she had so much peace about me. It's like yes, this is divinely coordinated. So I had this assistant, I had support, she shows up, clients are showing up. And I'm not out there pounding the pavement. I'm not out there doing the networking that I'd plan to do. I'm not out there doing the meetings and the coffee dates and all of the things that I had filled my schedule with before he told me drop everything and go write my book. And yet, he kept showing up. He was providing financially from places that I didn't expect, so that I could invest in the publishing process. All of this is happening while I'm in this space of just outflow of energy and giving so much of what I have to this book and just maintaining life and saying, Okay, it's temporary. Okay, it's temporary. We'll get through this, we'll get through this, we'll get through this. This part of the process was one of the hardest parts. And it's a combination of all of these things is a combination of the exhaustion. It's a combination of the Venn defaulting into the old patterns, and the mindset challenges and the questioning, do I know enough? Because I need to do research, and really challenging? How connected Am I in my spiritual walk in my walk with Jesus? Like, where are the spaces that he's trying to grow me or he's trying to remind me that it's not about you, Juli. It's not about your ego, it's not about your pride, it's not about what's going to come of this and what that's going to mean for you. It's about what I'm going to do through it. All of that showing up. And yet he is providing so beautifully and so tangibly in the process. So here's what you need to know about what comes next. Once the actual first draft is out, in it's messy, and let's be real, it's gonna be messy. Then there is this first round of editing. And there's figuring out publishers or professional editing or whatever you're gonna do there. And that's a whole nother thing. It's a whole nother growth curve and mindset challenge. And that's where we're going next week is into that phase of, okay, this first draft is done, and we can celebrate that. And now there's all these next steps. And there's one other thing that I'm thinking of, as I'm saying that that I just want to tie into before we wrap up for today. I did not allow myself while I was in the process of writing the first draft of the book, to even think about how I was going to go about publishing, promoting or launching this thing because it took what I had to focus in on just getting the content on paper. Did I tell my network that I was doing it my social media audience? Absolutely. But was I focused on building out a plan for how am I going to sell this thing? Or who am I going to reach with it through what means or systems or spaces? No. Because we have to focus in on what's the next step. The big picture, when there's that much outflow of energy just is too big, it's overwhelming. And we don't want to give our ego that much power. So make sure to pop back in next week's we can talk about editing. And I will share all of the nitty gritty on that with you and how we picked a publishing option. Make sure to share this with people who you know, who might be interested in writing a book or thinking about it, or maybe playing small on it. Let's be real. It's a lot of people and probably more than you think in your sphere, who have a dream to be an author. And unless they're challenged unless we have the opportunity to shake their tree and to give them the reality of what this looks like. They'll never get and get on the presale list. Okay, that's it for this week. All my love and Virtual hugs. Talk to you soon. I hope this episode triggered something in you and got you thinking about your next growth curve. Make sure to check out the show notes for more details and links to resources or people that we've mentioned today. And make sure you hit follow or subscribe and if you have a hot minute will leave an awesome review. I would be so beyond grateful. Until next time, be too much DARE YOU